Friday, June 23, 2017

LIMITED Commissions Open

Folks, I announced last month or so that I was stopping all commissions. This is true, as my current health issues warrant me to slow down a bit. But this weekend I decided to open the list up to a very few LIMITED number of commissions. This week only. Saturday to Saturday. I will be doing commissions. Here is the price breakdown:

----Digital Commission Only - Full color. One image. 1-4 characters. $40.

----Digital Commission Page - Full color. 1-4 characters max. 6 panel limit. $60 per page.

----8x11 Bristol. Inks or pencils only. 1-4 characters max, single image. $60.

----11x17 bristol comic art page. 1-4 characters max, 6 panel limit. $75 per page.

I am also selling off comic pages.

----3 PAGE BUNDLE: Pick the book or a mixture of pages from my comics. $75 for 3.

----5 PAGE BUNDLE: Pick the book or a mixture of pages. $100 for 5.

I take paypal at: phymns@yahoo.com

Act quick! Sale only goes this week. And if the list gets too big, I will close the sale early. Please allow 2-4 weeks for completion and delivery. And yes, I do nudity/sex scenes. (DUH)

Any questions, email me. Thanks!

--T

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Of Dreams Broken and Mountains To Climb


Yesterday I felt very gutted. Very hurt and empty. As yet another dream was denied me. I went for a consultation to get a mortgage for a house and it was declined. The dude worked with me for a long while. We tried resuscitating the dream, trying to make it live. We crunched the numbers and we went about every scenario possible, but alas, it just isn't going to line up.

...For now.

There is too much from my past holding me back. I pay too much in child support. I got a mountain in unpaid college loans. A few other things, mostly related to a previous relationship. In the end, it is what it is. And the dreams I've been having of getting my own place, mowing my own lawn, space for my kids, myself and a future investment for my kids is just not going to happen.

...For now.

In order for it to eventually happen, I'm standing at the base of a mountain. I'm just standing there, staring up at it. No climbing gear. Wondering if I should even bother to start climbing it.

I've been in this position before in my life. You see, owning my own home has been a dream of mine all my life. I have lived in over 17 different apartments. Yes, 17. I have moved a total of 32 times as well. I'm tired of moving. I'm tired of not owning what and where I live. I got a pile of stuff in boxes for "one day I can have it at my house." No room to use it or display it. I constantly scan websites of interior design and decorating that I could do in this dream home. But along the way, my life and the damage that has happened has held that dream back and apparently will continue to do so.

Like I said, I've been in this position before. Staring up at a mountain of a dream. I climb and then slide off. Failure. I've had many dreams in my life but usually they don't pan out the way I want them to. We cannot control everything in the world and we cannot make things line up exactly how we want it to. So it goes. It is what it is. And we pat ourselves on the back and say "well, at least I tried."

Yesterday I didn't feel like patting myself on the back. "Good try, next time," I'd say. No. I felt like crawling inside myself and screaming: "THIS IS YOUR FAULT. You should have tried harder in school. You shoulda paid on those loans. You shoulda saw what happened to you coming. You shoulda, you shoulda, you shoulda..." I'm very good at taking on blame that usually isn't mine. It might be the trait I excel at the most.

There are ways to make the dream happen. But I'm hyper aware of the clock ticking behind me. And after so many shattered dreams from my past now haunting me, I am scared to climb up again. Another dream gone. So maybe I should settle. Maybe I should be happy with what I got. Maybe I got just enough and I don't need anything else. Maybe I'm just jealous of others who got it and I don't. etc. etc. etc. After all, maybe I should listen to Tom Waits... and this song that I listened to yesterday:

House Where Nobody Lives

There's a house on my block
that's abandoned and cold
Folks moved out of it a
long time ago
and they took all their things
and they never came back
Looks like it's haunted
with the windows all cracked
and everyone calls it
the house, the house where
nobody lives.

Once it held laughter
Once it held dreams
Did they throw it away
Did they know what it means
Did someone's heart break
or did someone do somebody wrong?

Well the paint was all cracked
It was peeled off of the wood
Papers were stacked on the porch
where I stood
and the weeds had grown up
just as high as the door
There were birds in the chimney
and an old chest of drawers
Looks like no one will ever
come back to the
House where nobody lives

So if you find someone
someone to have, someone to hold
Don't trade it for silver
Don't trade it for gold
I have all of life's treasures
and they are fine and they are good
They remind me that houses
Are just made of wood
What makes a house grand
Ain't the roof or the doors
If there's love in a house
It's a palace for sure
Without love
It ain't nothin but a house
A house where nobody lives

So yes, maybe this dream slips away... for now. Maybe I will climb the mountain and get rid of all that holds me back and achieve the dream. I got a few other mountains staring at me too. I'm stuck in the valley looking up at all of them. No climbing gear. No tent to rest in. Just me. So do I have the will to walk up to one and get it going? Or to start chopping it down with the edge of my hand, like Jimi Hendrix said? Good question. 

Let's find out...

--T

Thursday, June 15, 2017

Remembering Adam West (and other things)

Hey friends. Been a busy week as always. My sleep is all jacked up again but I think I've finally got myself in a nice routine... but that won't last, of course. I'm just so uncoordinated and cloudy lately. I fell at work this week. Just was bending over to pick something up, lost my footing somehow and tumbled backward into a hard wall. I got a big bruise on my head and my arm:

Ouchie!

There were fears of a concussion... but my big ol' head took the most of the impact and I came out fine. I might not remember the piano lessons anymore, but that's okay.

It is HOT here in Michigan! Monday it was 92 degrees! I've been sitting in ball soup everyday. Its causing heat rashes under my huge belly. (But I'm down 14 pounds now!) But even the cats are feeling the heat:


I was blessed by the art gods of a not so sore hand when I attempted to draw this week. I was able to squeeze five new Starslam pages out! I think I found a good way to work that isn't so taxing on my hand, and that is to work smaller. Instead of 10x15, I do the pages on 10x6.5. For some pics and scenes I'll go bigger but its helping me cut my workload down a bit. Last week I got 8 pages in on the other erotica project. About 15 more and that is done. Then I just gotta color/balloon all of it and then assemble it together. Home stretch, right? I keep getting newly colored pages back from Andy as well. I'm so thrilled with his coloring choices on the pages I give him. He sees things I didn't think about doing. For example:

I didn't think to make the floor a wooden one, or to add mirrors in the background! And leaving him the choices to make on what colors something should be is such a treat to get back and see! Its like reading a comic I didn't draw!
And speaking of STARSLAM, if you go back in my Twitter page a week or so, you'll see some exclusive NSFW Starslam pages I teased. Warning: SPOILERS! (and boobs, dicks and other things)

I'm having a rough week as far as "thinky pain" as I call it. Just random depression hitting me and then I go back up the slope and I'm okay again. I'm trying to keep myself distracted but just life and exhaustion and the heat start to take its toll. I was reading today about an artist I'm familiar with whose liver is failing and its likely he won't make it to Christmas. I wasn't this guy's biggest fan for a few reasons, but it makes me feel sad for him and his family. No one should have to go through the things he is going through with that and other health shit going on. My friend Anna was re-approved for her Kidney Transplant surgery. I know she goes through a lot as well. Everywhere I turn there is good news/bad news. But sometimes it comes back around to good again. It helps me keep a smile on and gives me hope.

However, this last weekend was some bad news:


The exclusive ADAM CLUB lost our president. A devastating loss to my personal pop culture world. When I was a kid, BATMAN became a big thing in 1989 with the upcoming release of the Tim Burton movie. Before it came out in the summer, Nick at Nite started running Batman 1960's TV Show marathons and that is where I first got my taste of Adam. I loved the show as a kid and that is where my love with The Riddler came from. I got to meet Frank Gorshin later in life before he died. I never got to meet Adam. I was near him a couple times when I was at shows, but I never bothered to get in line and get something signed. I think back again to when I was a kid and that spring/summer of 1989. My mom rented BATMAN THE MOVIE (60s, again) and taped it onto Betamax for me. I would come home from school and fry up some home made potato wedges and watch the movie. I must have watched that movie 50 times that year and into the 1990s. It was one of my first cheap Blu-ray purchases. I can recite the whole thing. Recently they FINALLY released the series on DVD/BR... I haven't bought it yet. Just been busy and don't have time to really sit down for it. As an adult it reads campy and farcical. But still, I should take the time to do it. It was my era of TV. STAR TREK was on Tv. As well as LOST IN SPACE and GET SMART.

Years later, I would enjoy Adam in random B/D movies like "Maxium Xul" or "The Happy Hooker." And then he popped up on this little cartoon I got into called "Family Guy." Everytime he was on screen in that show he was a hoot. A whole new generation was being turned onto him and his unique humor. I loved it. I haven't kept up with the show every much lately, but maybe I will trek back and see what new things he did on there.

This one sucks. I know within the next ten years a lot of my heroes will most likely be going too. Favorite actors, childhood heroes, favorite musicians... I'm getting to that age. It sucks. But at least they all leave behind a body of work to be loved and cherished for all time. And I'm thankful I got to live at the same time as some of these people. Its an amazing time to be alive and I wouldn't trade it for any other era. And before I climb the bat-rope to the heavens myself, I will sit back and enjoy what they leave behind. Thank you Mr. Mayor, Mr. West, Mr. Wayne, Batman, Adam We... You will be greatly missed.

Okay, barring any major things to happen, I'm going to get back to work. I might be quieter than usual and that is because I'm trying to beat a deadline here. I will come back soon with some great stuff to share. In my silence don't think I'm not doing anything... I'm doing plenty!

Cheers, T




Thursday, June 08, 2017

TOOL Concert review

Hey friends!

So I finally saw TOOL for the first time in my life and it was a killer show. How could it not be, right? The opening band wasn't that good, but the show TOOL put on more than made up for it. The drinks were way overpriced, which is to be expected. But all in all, we had a good time. Pics speak louder than words, don't you think?

I always try to get a ticket for the souvenir book. I have almost 30 now I think.

D got all dressed up. She NEVER lets me take a picture of her without her doing something goofy, so this is as best as I could get. Still, she looked very pretty. Had to document that.

We decided to go to Clarkston early and try this BBQ place called "Union Woodshop." D reports that they have the best potato salad and baked mac n' cheese. My plate consisted of more unhealthy choices and pulled pork! But I ended up taking half of it home. Very delicious!

Being idiots in the garden before the show.

Can we ever just take a "nice" picture?
There were signs all around and the security was VERY adamant that there was no video or photos allowed in the venue. Therefore, I didn't chance taking any pics of audio of my own. I didn't want to get kicked out. I'm not much of a rule breaker. Besides: My iphone camera usually turns out shitty pics anyway. So here are a few shots that others took and uploaded of the show: 

AWESOME back screen light show.


Maynard (of course) sings from the back of the stage in shadow. So there he is on the left.


The highlight for me was seeing (but mostly hearing due to an obstructed view) Danny's drum solo after the intermission. He is one of my top five favorite modern drummers. I cannot find video online of the solo yet, but I'm sure some will pop up.

I did find this video of their closing song: STINKFIST and at the end of the show, Danny comes out wearing a Pistons jersey. And then Adam Jones brings out his little kid and waves to the audience. It was a rare sight to see anything slighty "human" from that band! Here's the video:



As far as anything political said, here's what Maynard had to say:

"Home. (he's from Michigan)
Anyone here from CMU? (I clap a bit) How about Wolverines? (Meaning UofM) Any Spartans out there? (meaning MSU) Spartans, how do you feel about the Wolverines? (People boo) Wolverines, how do you like the Spartans? (People boo) One common word that is missing from all those things is "Michigan." (Everyone cheers.) You see? Some common ground. Now apply that same concept to this thing called: EARTH. (everyone cheers loudly) Ignorance is the enemy."

All in all, it was a good time and I'm glad I finally got to see them. Next time I think I will bring my own alcohol in instead of paying $20 for two shot glasses full of frozen daqueri. I think we paid mostly for the big straws that came with it. But anyway, here's hoping there's a new TOOL album soon and we can relive it all again.

--T


Tuesday, June 06, 2017

My Shitty Brain

Hey friends.

Thought I would update about nothing in particular. My new FB page has a way of warning me when I am not posting enough, so I thought I would try to write this morning to shut it up with a post about a new blog here. I don't have much to say as there hasn't been much going on. This past weekend I had my kids so I didn't get any work done. I was feeling down in the dumps a bit too and for no particular reason, really. This week was my friend Caleb's birthday (RIP) and also money has been kinda tight, so I haven't had much to go out and play with. I got a TO DO list a mile long and I'm swiping away with it a day at a time. Maybe that all has something to do with it.

My sleep is erratic as well due to a 4:30am wake-up to get the kids on Saturday. I find that the older I get, the worse I am to re-cooperate when my sleep pattern gets fucked up. It takes a few days. And by the time I right myself, I have to do it all over again. I woke up at 6am this morning after going to bed at 2am last night. See what I mean? Makes my brain go haywire sometimes.

But that's the day to day juggle. Not much else to say about it. Some days I am good and some days I have the feels about one thing or the other. Mostly about the things I gotta get done or friends/family that are gone. Sometimes its the bullshit going on in the world, politics, etc. I know I suffer from depression but for the most part, I feel like I got it handled. I'm ok. And that's all I need to be sometimes, you know? And then sometimes I just like to have a nice drink and forget about it all for a little while. I think when I do that, I scare some people. Like maybe I make people think I am worse off than I am. For example this weekend:


I didn't intend for my tweet to be a "cry for help" type of situation. But this person reached out and made me feel better. I certainly appreciate it! But please, don't think I'm whining or in dire need for attention or validation. I'm doing ok. But it means the world to me when people do reach out and care like this person did above. So often we create in a vacuum and now that the convention world has completely changed and its harder to get that face to face thumbs up from your peers and fans, to feel validated or that you matter at all can sometimes be a stretch for people at my level.

But I do get lots of emails, PMs and messages back that do show that, yes indeed, I am loved and I DO feel it. Thank you very much, folks. Its this back and forth from me to you that I have worked hard over the years to cultivate. I have pumped out weekly content for years and years on this blog and my podcasts. In this, I've strived to be brutally honest and open at all times. I've teased and revealed. I've shared and lost. I've struggled and celebrated. Its all on here and nicely archived. These things are my therapy as much as the occasional drink some booze/listen to Bob Dylan private sessions I have with myself. Its how I deal with things.

So please know, things are going good. I'm getting work done, I'm losing weight (down 11 pounds now), I'm going out and doing things (seeing TOOL live tomorrow) and I got a support group all around me to keep me sane. Bills are paid, I got things I like and love... I'm good. I really am. I know I am blessed in this life. And I appreciate you folks checking me out and keeping me in your life. I see the downloads, the likes, the reposts, the views on all my stuff and I take note of who is paying attention. I appreciate it.

All of this will not go unrewarded! The comics I got going will come out. The books I have promised will come out as well. There is so much work to do before I can sit back and relax. And I'm sure much more after that. It won't stop until I do.

Anyway thanks for the continued love and support, my friends. Much love to all of you.

------NOTES/PLUGS------

New episode of the IDIOTHEAD MORNING SHOW, I review the new Roger Waters album! Stream it HERE - Also subscribe Via ITUNES! And while you are there, leave a comment. It helps my numbers and ratings. I appreciate it.

You can download PDFs of all my major comic graphic novels via Gumroad right now for the cheap price of $5 each! Download and read on your device of choice! Buy em right HERE
-or- If you prefer physical copies you can get them at my online store right HERE - Each book gets a hand drawn sketch inside as a bonus and a thank you.

Episode 500 of the IDIOTHEAD MORNING SHOW PODCAST is coming soon! If you got a question to be answered live on the air or a suggestion for a show topic, hit me with an email right here: phymns@yahoo.com

--T

Thursday, June 01, 2017

Facebook Page, Beatles and More

Hey friends, 
 
Just so people are reminded, I am moving all FB activity to a public page. My old personal profile will maintain no posts or activity beyond this point. This is in an effort to keep me focused on my creating and not the insanity of the back and forth keyboard war that we so often lose ourselves in. Anything personal will likely go into the blog here at my site and any business announcements will be posted on my new FB page here: https://www.facebook.com/AdamTalleyArtistWriterGuy/ I suggest you "LIKE" and "FOLLOW" that page if you want to keep up with me and what I am doing. Or continue to download/stream my IDIOTHEAD MORNING SHOW PODCAST via Itunes or Talkshoe.

2017 will see me releasing probably THREE more books and 2018 I have some big plans for. So there is lots to come from me. I appreciate all the love and support I have got throughout the years and as I kick this car into gear and head for the finishing line in the comics' world, I hope you will help me see this journey to the end and what lies beyond. There is so much to come.

Last night the art gods blessed me with seven new pages and my hand stayed strong throughout! I'm very happy about that. I'm scanning them up today and getting them ready to go. I'm striving hard to push this first erotica book out the door now that I am past the halfway point on Starslam 3. So expect a Kickstarter to begin something later this summer. Starslam 3's Kickstarter will be the fall or early winter I think, if all goes well. And there is a third book of sorts of my art coming from someone else. All exciting things! So much to do...

After last blog's confession I've been getting messages of encouragement and advice and I appreciate all of it. The numbers are shocking, I know. But it certainly isn't a death sentence in my view. Many have beat this demon and I will be no different. I've already begun to do so.

The Beatles SGT PEPPERS came out 50 years ago today. I remember when I first heard that album and how it seemed that all music had changed for me. I realized all the doors that album opened in my listening experience and how it gave birth to progressive rock... a genre many of my favorite bands live in. All beginning right there. Happy birthday, Sgt. Peppers. Long live the memories! 

Tomorrow a new ROGER WATERS album comes out. His first since 1992!!! I'm sure a lot of it is about the current political climate and I cannot wait to dig into it. I'll give a full review soon. 

My girl and I went to the movies the other day and saw SNATCHED. The new Amy Schumer/Goldie Hawn movie. While not the next CITIZEN KANE, I laughed in a few parts. Its worth a watch as a dumb comedy. Go enjoy it. 
 
Next week I'm seeing TOOL live here in Michigan! I'm beyond excited to finally get to see them. Expect pics and a full report... if not some audio/video from the show. Oh yes. 

I suppose that is it. I will get with you all next week sometime about all the progress that has been going on all the things cooking on my stove. Maybe even some progress art pics! We'll see... if you are good! 

Cheers, T

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Back to the Grind and a Confession

Hey friends,

Well, Vacation week is over. It doesn't seem like it should be, but it is. I worked very hard for this last week and now its gone. I did a lot, saw a lot of people I never get to see, got comic work done, reading done, went to the movies (saw SNATCHED. Not bad), Had TV marathons, went out to dinner, deep talking with friends, played video games, napped, cleaned, petted kitties, got drunk, jammed on music, drew 5 pages, lounged out in front of air conditioner, ate a shit-ton of crappy food, traveled 600 miles and back and much more.

And now its over. Back to work today. Back to the daily grind.

It really flew by, man. It seems like yesterday. I honestly could do another week of this. I'm not sure I feel rested at all. But I do get some rest coming up. There is the TOOL concert in early June. End of June is the Chicago trip. The summer will bring some fun with the kids and holidays and all that. But my entire vacation time is spent. I gotta make it to January 1st now with not much rest to have.

Honestly, that is okay. I got things planned. Things I have to do (finally). There is so much work ahead. I got probably THREE books to launch before the end of the year. Right now the focus is on my health. This carpal Tunnel thing will continue to be worked with and monitored. And I am focusing on my weight loss. We haven't had sodas in the house for almost two weeks now. I've had them if we go out but the weaning has already begun. I plan to go hardcore on the fruits and veggies until I get below 300.

I'll be brutally honest here. I think its the best way I can be in this life. I find strength in being honest. About two weeks ago, I got on the scale and I crossed a margin. An unthinkable margin. The total I weighed that day?

402 pounds.

Yes, I crossed the 400 pound mark. Severely morbidly obese. I stepped off the scale and I was in shock. I have gained 82 pounds in over a year. I am now officially one foot in the grave. I cried to myself as I wondered how it all happened. But I knew. Of course I knew. The depression led me to eat. I have a sedentary job, I snack. The sodas. The fast food. No exercise... its no mystery as to what I did to myself. I'm scared to go to the doctor. I'm scared to do anything, honestly. I don't feel right. I feel wobbly and full of panic.

But all this means is I am awake and aware of what I have done and what I must do now.

My goal is to drop 100 pounds. Right now. Immediately. So I am going hardcore. I gotta get out of the danger zone.... or die trying. And right now, I feel like living. I got shit to do. So I am going to get this freight train back on the rails and kicking ass at this thing. I'm struggling to survive and its time I woke up and get myself under control.

There are so many other things I want to do beyond just the weight loss. I have to save for many things coming up. I have to find time to get work done. I have to this, I have to that. And it will be easy to do because everything is a choice. What do you choose? What are you more hungry for? Future dreams, to live thinner and happier or what I have been doing so far with a very limited life? I wasn't created to live depressed, defeated, ashamed or condemned and unworthy. I was created to be victorious. And its my turn. I choose life.

So 'scuse me while I take care of some personal business. Stuff I keep saying I have to do but now, HAVE to do it. And I will. Because I can. And if you are in a similar boat as mine, so can you.

Anyway, back to the grind of work and getting my life under control. Meanwhile, here are some pics to entertain:

The kittens got adopted out! Chloe went to her new home and Sebastian went to one as well. The grey one (we named her Luna) was declared the winner and we chose her to stay with us. We're happy with our decision but miss all of them greatly.

Co-worker NES party.

Lots o' gamez being played!

DC represent!

Luna and Sebastian. Last time together.

Sebastian, moments before he was picked up. I'll miss that boy. :(

Here's our Luna... very cute and loving kitten.

Some edited for content and spoiler free new pages from STARSLAM 3. Its really coming along!