Time Out!!!

When you're in constant motion, its sometimes hard to know when to stop.

The artist sacrifices alot for their craft. Mostly time and body. The back and butt hurts from sitting in the chair all day. The eyes hurt from staring at the screen too much. The hand cramps up. You gain weight by snacking. You lose precious time with your significant other and your offspring.

Believe me, I am not complaining. I got the greatest job in the world and its full of very loyal fans. (Thank you very much!) But also you gotta know when to take a break. So every week now I am proposing a night to myself. Just to sit and watch a DVD or three. No chair, no art table. Just me and a night off. The wife enjoys that cause that means she doesn't have to sleep alone. So thats what I did last night. Even though I worked all day on stuff in the office and made my new TO DO list that is a mile long, I took the night off.

Even last night I was discussing my fatigue with the wife saying that I want to take a month off from drawing. And I said that even knowing that I would not, could not. I love it too much. The commissions and hired work is finally pouring in regularly and its feeding my family. I cannot stop, nor do I want to. Would I rather work 40 hours a week at a job I hate or do what I am doing now? BY FAR I would stick with my current situation. And its looking like thats gonna last a while for my lifetime.

While my dedication to my craft and to those who enjoy my work is strong as ever, I must admit that I do need a "night off" sometimes. So I shall strive to take a night or two a week to myself and spend it with the wife watching movies. One of my great passions. Just to sit and veg out at a movie. Refreshes the visual brain and side of what I do. Feels good. It was my first passion.

It was only after I went to college and started to dissect and analyze things to construct my own things from its remains that I became a bitter, angry, cynical person. A recent South Park discusses this mentality. And I've ranted about it on Twitter as well. How we have really become obsessed with naysaying things before experiencing it. How cynical we are to everything that we are exposed to, good and bad. How each of us now has an outlet for our stupid little opinions and are looking for internet high fives. It sickens me at times. You cannot experience a hurtful or horrid thing without some joker coming in and pissing on the party. I'm finding that I am at the point to where that sort of thing really gets to me and derails my thought process on a thing experienced. Take for example Gay Marriage. It was just approved to be legal for gays to marry in New York. A wonderful thing! Something people have been fighting to gain for years, decades. And along with the congratulations came the jokes. I guess its how humanity reacts to things now. Its how we process things. We cannot just accept what is without cynicism. Its how we handle it all now.

Me? I try to just give a base reaction and move on down the trail, that is IF I feel I should react. To some things, there is no concern or consequence if I had an opinion on it or not. However, this is a double edged sword for me. I am the face of my "business". Moreover, people expect to be entertained by me and my personality, and that is what would draw them to my work. As an artist I am trying to evolve to where the work speaks alone. The best artists throughout time have this. They don't need to explain what it is, or where it comes from. Thats for everyone else to decide. One day. One day. I am getting there.

I guess these are just my current thoughts for the day. As I work on, I realize that perhaps finally I got my head on straight. I can still laugh and joke and see humor in tragedy and just enjoy other people reacting. I don't have to. I don't have to bring myself there in my head. Moreover, I am finding this thing I had lost somewhere when my adult life began. I somehow lost my ability to be stoked on everything. Like, "wow! Check out this band!" Or "Wow! That movie was awesome!" Even if the reviews were bad. I just have been striving to rid myself of the negativity in my life. And its working. Its finally working. If the right arm causes me to stumble, I am learning to cut it off and throw it away from me. My life is too short to be so concerned with people or things that don't deserve to be an issue in my life. Thats my motto right there.

Now if only I could find some peace while I am driving. I have terrible road rage...

T

---To elaborate on what I just said: Its too cool a time in the world to be angry at all! It seems as though we are finally evolving as a people, a place. Things are looking up. If you ignore all the politics and the argumentative, cynical little people, its just a great time to be alive! Never let that leave your mind, and you will do well.