Well, back from St. Joseph from a fun weekend. I searched around for apartments and jobs, but really got no bites. At least, not as great as I was hoping for. Upon further chatting with the wife, we decided its not in our best interest to leave town just yet. I am very bummed and I have as a result bummed out two very close friends of mine. I feel guilty as all hell for bringing this shit roller coaster to them. My life is that roller coaster. Ups and downs galore. One day I want this, the next I decide that... its too much for some to live. Tell me about it.
I regret it when I cause problems for people. I like to stay cool and clear out of everyone's way. But this time I blew it big time. I only hope that the breech isn't beyond repairing. But onward and upward I say. Lets get back to my old, boring, so-called life....
I played DRAGON QUEST 8 this weekend. After about 10 seconds of watching it play out before my eyes I decided "I MUST OWN THIS GAME NOW!!!" So, own it I shall, as soon as I get my tax refund! Watched the SUPERBOWL. My team lost, but I wasn't that bummed about it. I couldn't really care cause all the REAL teams I like were eliminated already. So, whatever. I also came home and drew on about 3 pages. Also, some promo art for possible backdrops for the convention season. Busy as ever.
All of these things still cannot take my mind off of the crap I've done this weekend. I totally blew it. I try sometimes, perhaps too hard to let the "lord" lead me and take me where I should be. I know its not here, and for now... its not there... What I do know is to keep working my books, go to conventions and keep doing what I am doing. But on the job and friend front, its quite boring. I've tried to follow my guts. But so far, my guts have shit for brains.
Anyone relate to that?
Anyway, I'm not able to sleep to well. I've totally screwed the pooch. I cannot deal with it. Disrupting the lives of others is my biggest hate that I do. Sorry to those involved, and to any others that I have caused harm to. I will endevour to continue to carve my crap niche in the world and stay out of evolution's way.
Break on Through...
T
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