Tuesday, July 11, 2017

A for Effort

Welcome back my friends. I just slept 13 hours to refill my tanks from a long weekend with the boys. For some reason this weekend I couldn't sleep at all. Maybe 3 hours a night. Just my brain on overdrive. No THINKY PAIN this time, just random BS. Same old way my brain always works. Laying in bed at 3am then I think, "Whatever happened to that studio where Rush recorded all those albums like "Moving Pictures" and "Signals?" I heard they were closing it. What happened with that?" Then I'm on google or youtube trying to find random BS facts about that random thing I just thought up. Cause I know if I don't do that the second I think of it, I'll forget about it and then spend hours going, "What was I wanting to look up last night? I can't remember!" I used to just leave a notepad at my bed table to write down thoughts. But then the next day I can't read my chicken scratch or I decide what I wrote wasn't worth pursuing. Vicious cycle I put my brain through. I should get some pills to mellow myself out. But I'm not a drug guy.

I had fun with my boys this weekend:

Through a trade I recently acquired an old Millennium Falcon toy. I got it for the kids. Here is James slowly discovering it. Twas a nice moment to pass along something from my youth to him. I had so many fun years with my own Falcon toy.

James loves the slides at the Jumping Jax bounce house in Lansing.

Bounce houses is something James and Scott-Bot can both get in on!

Momma Belle and Baby Luna observing the boys and their activities. Man, Luna has got so big!!

My best friend.
I spent all Monday trying to recooperate on sleep, while my poor girlfriend had to clean the house on her own. It was nice of her to sacrifice her time to see that I could lay down and awake 13 hours later to be somewhat normal.... whatever normal is for me lately.

I haven't done much this past weekend on comics stuff. This week I hope to get the final drawings done for the newest book I hope to get the Kickstarter rolling for. Then word ballooning as well. I have a Saturday to myself this weekend as D is going camping up north. But then I gotta see the boys Sunday for a condensed time and get my sleep pattern changed to tackle a week of overnights. I'm doing last stretch training at the day job that will open a lot of opportunities for me. New programs, new ways to output digital work and all of that leads into more overtime... something that will help with my long term life goals. It will probably condense a bit more of my "free time," but eh, I don't care. I got an opportunity here to make some cash and start saving/paying off things. That is where my life needs to be leading at the moment. I got so many goals (small and big) to work on. This whole effort at the day job will help make a lot of it happen. Necessary.

Speaking of life, I want to tackle a sensitive subject. I know a lot of people read this and so I hope to address it here. I know I'm busy. I know lots of my free time is occupied with kids, adulting and all my creative endeavors.  But sometimes people read me being busy the wrong way and then think I am avoiding them or something to that nature. Then that leads to me being blocked or unfriended or unfollowed on social media or just basically written off as a friend. It really pains me to see when that happens. Every day I'll think to an old friend or acquaintance I haven't heard from in a while and I check up on them. And it is easy to see when they have unliked, unfriended or unfollowed me in some way. Sometimes I'll contact them and work out what they are thinking or feeling about me or the situation. I know so many people and with life's juggles its hard to keep up with everyone. Doesn't mean I don't care about you. My time is limited. Life has got in the way. Whatever the case is, its not an excuse I offer you. Nothing has changed for me. My heart and door is always open to those I care about. I'm very accessible by message, call, email, etc. You hit me with an email or message, I usually will get back to you within a day, if not minutes. I get saddened when someone who means so much to me feels I've wronged them in some way and feels it necessary to cut ties with me. It hurts to know that what you think you have with a person, after all you went through with them, that you can be so easily discarded or disregarded. I truly believe that people enter your life and are in your life at key moments. And you think, "Wow, thank God they were there then!" And before you know it, things somehow have changed between you. It sucks. It really does. I make efforts every week to reach out to someone (usually on Twitter or Facebook) with someone who I haven't talked to in a while. An old co-worker. An old college friend. An old artist buddy... etc. I've been blessed to cross paths with so many people. and with only a handful of arseholes I've now cut off from my life, I've been very lucky to know everyone I've met. Just know that when I am randomly thinking of stupid crap late at night, I'm also randomly thinking about you too. "Whatever happened to so and so? Man I miss when we worked together or were at that show together that one year. I wonder how their kids are doing or what they are working on now..." My thoughts are always on you. I try to reach out. It makes me feel great when I do. And I am glad when others reach out to me too. Even if its just a LIKE or a comment on the blog here. It lets me know you are still out there and give a shit. I notice all who do it. Don't think your simple clicks through your busy day are lost on me. I notice who is still there in my corner. And just know, I am still in yours. I love you all!

Man, I got a TO DO list 28 miles long. Mountains to climb. Dreams to grab hold of and force them into existence. Everyday I chop at the thick tree, waiting for it to crunch and topple over and get the fuck out of my way.

Give me an A for Effort. I'm trying hard folks. I really am.

--T

2 comments:

Caleb & Jen said...

With all the stuff on your plate, we never feel upset if a response or update takes a bit. Quite to the contrary; if we don't hear from you for a while, we check in to make sure you're okay. Because that's what friends do.

It's nice to hear that your life is full, but with things that you love. The boys, music, a lovely woman, friends, and some much needed sleep. And somehow, filling in the cracks, you manage to write some really fun stories and get some of our favorite superheroes laid.

I hope commissions went well and you earned everything you needed. Always love seeing your new work.

Phymns said...

I did, thanks folks! and I appreciate the updates from you as well!