Thanksgiving Thoughts

Gobble Gobble my friends.

This year for Thanksgiving we are spending the day at my GFs parents, eating hearty, watching the Lions lose, and being merry. Then Fri through Saturday its back home for busy time. Except I have to work. I also gotta finish these cards like THIS WEEKEND in order to meet deadline. I got about 25 left to pencil/ink and about 60 to color. Ill make it, no problem. There is so many other things to do. I got a TO DO list a mile and 3/4ths long. I got some anger about some things going on, but also a lot of excitement as well. Nothing I want to spoil quite yet but things are about to get crazy here in Talleyland.

Its been a busy few weeks and last night, mentally, I kinda went to the zoo. I lost my mind about some stuff going on. I just simply lost it with anger and the stress of everything Ive been drifting through lately boiled over. But I did not drink, I did not cry. I just rolled through it. I got home and watched some Curb Your Enthusiasm and went to sleep. This morning I am better and ready to let it roll off my shoulders.

All I can have this morning is gratitude. Things I am thankful for. Like having a good job, my bills are all paid thanks to my hard work, loving and supportive fans around the world, a great relationship, great kids, any toy or cd/dvd/record I could want, etc. I could list them all but Ill just keep the good thoughts internal so they fight off all the bad think pain thoughts. So much great stuff is coming. So much... I truly feel like its going to be okay and everything I am working so damn hard for is going to come to fruition. Some major hurdles are about to be jumped over and kicked to the ground. Positive things are happening. Stuff that makes me excited to make it happen and enjoy the experience while it lasts!

And that is just in my personal life. In my professional life, at the day job Im about a NOIINE (Stern show reference) and in my second job, Im quickly approaching a personal TEN! I pencilled and inked two short stories for the Patreon page. I am getting these new sketch cards out the door. I am finally ramped up and better at consistency at getting things done. I ordered the books for the new Kickstarter and I am doing commissions and sketches for it. Everything Ive had on hold is now starting to come together. Its an exciting time.

When I think of these things, this greatness to come (personally and professionally), it is hard to dwell in the anger that derailed me last night. I am ashamed I let it get to me. Because in the end, it really does not matter. The only thing that matters is how I feel about things and my efforts to make things in my life happen. And right now, things are going great. You will see some of the positive stuff coming my way very soon.

Anyway, how about some pics?

We started XMAS shopping early. Lily Munster always likes the boxes we bring in.

Lilly and Luna Butt, sitting in a tree....

My one relaxing time the last few weeks was another Nintendo get together. I got to beat Kung Fu, TMNT 4 and played a few others. Always important to let loose and party like the old, old men that we are... Do we slay hookers and slam some blow and booze? No... we slam simple beers and play 30 year old video games. Look out ladies, HOT!!!

I am putting it all together. I am keeping it all together. In 2018, we shall all reap the results!

Happy Holiday to those who celebrate. May your turkeys be tasty and your taters be fluffy. I know mine will be.

~~T

Cobwebs Suck

Hey friends.

Dealing with the roller coaster this past week. Strikes and Gutters. Ups and Downs. Good and bad. Random BS in my head. Stuff I juggle in the day to day. Clearing off the cobwebs and cleaning off old stains of bloody shitty bullshit.

My oldest son Cody is up for a visit this week. Its so trippy to know in 5 months he will be 18 years old. The dude has a full beard and college plans n'shit. His life is in a bit of chaos right now and its good he came out to get away from it all. I hope I am providing him a nice respite from his troubles.

I had my other boys out here this past weekend. Its great when all three of my boys can be together in one place. All three are so different from one another. Its great to see how they all interact.

I had some financial BS go down this past week. Something that will effect me a bit longer than I expected it to. Its all okay, but its just frustrating to me. I'm busy trying to get my life back into some sort of order and to find things still being issues and holding me back just irritates me. Apparently it is always my duty in this life to clean up all messes, even if I didn't create them. If that is my folly in this life, that is fine. It is what it is. But one day I know I will be clear of everything that holds me back and I won't have to worry about this crap anymore. I live for those days. Its some peace I know I will earn.

Anyway, how about a pop culture-ish rant. This:

New Trek coming out and already they are trying to sell the sexuality of it. We got the ass, tits and face shot going here. I know, Seven of Nine and Tpol were the same thing... but still. I don't know. This cover rubs me the wrong way.

Anyway, I'm letting life return to normal. While still cleaning up the messes around me: 

S-ok. I got it.

Anyway, I hope everyone reading this has a great week. I will attempt to do so as well. Its all we can do. 

--T

Seeking Stability

Hey friends... um.... yeah... I uh... (zzzzzzzzzzzz)

I'm completely out of wack this past week. Working a 3rd shift schedule at the day job and its kinda zapped everything out of my week. I sleep in a few chunks throughout the day and its not consistent. I have not been able to accomplish a damn thing beyond basic eat/sleep type of existing. I start out the 3rd shift work just fine (siphoning off an AMP drink), but then twirl down like a top.

This is me on the first night of overnights around 7am. Barely surviving. Look at them heavy eyelids and dark dark dark circles!

Used to be when I was younger and trimmer I could stay up 2-3 days and get shit done. Not anymore. Simple changes throw me off. I need consistency in my schedule or else I'm unable to function even basically.

Luckily, my 3rd shift obligations end with tonight's shift. Then one more week of a couple mid-shifts and then back to my regular schedule at the day job. I can start to get back in the swing of things. My brain won't be as scattered, I can be more alert and not as moody.

Only productivity I've managed to produce this week is laying out In-design pages for word ballooning all projects on my plate. That took two hours, but I'm glad I slogged through it. All pages (that are done) are placed in the templates and ready to rock. Tedious, but its done. Every day I need one small step forward. I'll take what I can get, you know?

Luna Butt has been sympathetic... even though she likes to use me as furniture.

I showed my night crew friends a nice breakfast at GOLDEN HARVEST. Worf approves.

Before this crazy week, I cleaned the house up really great. James helped vacuum on Sunday, natch... but I organized books and the piles of CDs I've stacked up and reorganized the music organization. Progress.

Anyway, after this next week, I hope to start getting some stability, schedule-wise... thus lighting some firecrackers under my arse to get these pages word ballooned and ready to go. So much to do, so much to be awake and sane for.

Last thing: coming up pretty soon on my Idiothead Morning Show Podcast, I'll be doing episode 500. For that show I am holding a contest:

--Simply EMAIL ME a question (or a few) to read on the air and you will be entered into a drawing for THREE original art pages (1 from STARSLAM, 1 from PLEASANT LIFE and 1 from ANNA POCALYPSE) to be mailed to you! Only one winner will be drawn out of the names of people who email me at phymns@yahoo.com and ask a question before episode 500 airs. I will be collecting the questions and answering them live on the air. We got a little time, as I'm only on episode 483, but it will go pretty quickly. Might as well start plugging now and gathering questions. To enter, simply email me at "phymns@yahoo.com" and ask some questions for me to answer on the show. That enters you in. If you win, I will contact you for mailing info. ENTER NOW!!!!!!!!

Okay, off to your lives. Stay safe and sane out there!

--T

Back to the Grind and a Confession

Hey friends,

Well, Vacation week is over. It doesn't seem like it should be, but it is. I worked very hard for this last week and now its gone. I did a lot, saw a lot of people I never get to see, got comic work done, reading done, went to the movies (saw SNATCHED. Not bad), Had TV marathons, went out to dinner, deep talking with friends, played video games, napped, cleaned, petted kitties, got drunk, jammed on music, drew 5 pages, lounged out in front of air conditioner, ate a shit-ton of crappy food, traveled 600 miles and back and much more.

And now its over. Back to work today. Back to the daily grind.

It really flew by, man. It seems like yesterday. I honestly could do another week of this. I'm not sure I feel rested at all. But I do get some rest coming up. There is the TOOL concert in early June. End of June is the Chicago trip. The summer will bring some fun with the kids and holidays and all that. But my entire vacation time is spent. I gotta make it to January 1st now with not much rest to have.

Honestly, that is okay. I got things planned. Things I have to do (finally). There is so much work ahead. I got probably THREE books to launch before the end of the year. Right now the focus is on my health. This carpal Tunnel thing will continue to be worked with and monitored. And I am focusing on my weight loss. We haven't had sodas in the house for almost two weeks now. I've had them if we go out but the weaning has already begun. I plan to go hardcore on the fruits and veggies until I get below 300.

I'll be brutally honest here. I think its the best way I can be in this life. I find strength in being honest. About two weeks ago, I got on the scale and I crossed a margin. An unthinkable margin. The total I weighed that day?

402 pounds.

Yes, I crossed the 400 pound mark. Severely morbidly obese. I stepped off the scale and I was in shock. I have gained 82 pounds in over a year. I am now officially one foot in the grave. I cried to myself as I wondered how it all happened. But I knew. Of course I knew. The depression led me to eat. I have a sedentary job, I snack. The sodas. The fast food. No exercise... its no mystery as to what I did to myself. I'm scared to go to the doctor. I'm scared to do anything, honestly. I don't feel right. I feel wobbly and full of panic.

But all this means is I am awake and aware of what I have done and what I must do now.

My goal is to drop 100 pounds. Right now. Immediately. So I am going hardcore. I gotta get out of the danger zone.... or die trying. And right now, I feel like living. I got shit to do. So I am going to get this freight train back on the rails and kicking ass at this thing. I'm struggling to survive and its time I woke up and get myself under control.

There are so many other things I want to do beyond just the weight loss. I have to save for many things coming up. I have to find time to get work done. I have to this, I have to that. And it will be easy to do because everything is a choice. What do you choose? What are you more hungry for? Future dreams, to live thinner and happier or what I have been doing so far with a very limited life? I wasn't created to live depressed, defeated, ashamed or condemned and unworthy. I was created to be victorious. And its my turn. I choose life.

So 'scuse me while I take care of some personal business. Stuff I keep saying I have to do but now, HAVE to do it. And I will. Because I can. And if you are in a similar boat as mine, so can you.

Anyway, back to the grind of work and getting my life under control. Meanwhile, here are some pics to entertain:

The kittens got adopted out! Chloe went to her new home and Sebastian went to one as well. The grey one (we named her Luna) was declared the winner and we chose her to stay with us. We're happy with our decision but miss all of them greatly.

Co-worker NES party.

Lots o' gamez being played!

DC represent!

Luna and Sebastian. Last time together.

Sebastian, moments before he was picked up. I'll miss that boy. :(

Here's our Luna... very cute and loving kitten.

Some edited for content and spoiler free new pages from STARSLAM 3. Its really coming along!