Wrapping it Up... In More Ways Than One

Here we are my friends! My big annual year end wrap up!! This is going to be a big blog full of info and one that will stick with you. Some big announcements and reveals at the end. Let’s just get to it.

2017 sucked. Not as bad as 2016 did, but it still had the feel of a pants full of angry, hungry sea urchins, covered in Tabasco and rubbing alcohol. Politics sucked. Drama sucked. Celebrity deaths sucked... but we also gotta remember the good things that happened. Here are my personal lists for the year:

BEST ALBUMS:
Sons of Apollo
Spocks Beard: Snow Live
NIN: Add Violence/Not the Actual Events
U2: Songs of Experience
Roger Waters: Is this the life we really want

BEST MOVIES:
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Snatched
Trainspotting 2
The Founder

BEST TV SHOWS:
The Orville
Doctor Who

BEST BOOKS:
Doug Stanhope: Digging Up Mother
Invincible (ending early 2018. Rip)
Slots

BEST NEW DISCOVERIES:
The IT Crowd
Nightmare Before Xmas/Its a Wonderful Life (yes I finally saw them)
Mongolian BBQ
Fateful Findings/Neil Breen movies!!

WORST EVENTS OF THE YEAR:
Star Trek Discovery
Trump (nuff said)
Bat Blazer: RIP
Depression issues/therapy
Coworker’s baby health issues
Weight/health decline

BEST EVENTS OF THE YEAR:
Anna’s Kidney Transplant success
Tool/Roger Waters live!
Horrorhound in March
500th episode of Idiothead Morning Show
Two successful Kickstarter campaigns
Snes Classic release (I scored one! Fuck you, scalpers!)
Gumroad launch/success
New Idiothead music
New Car (aka The Pony)
Burlesque Show visit
Video Game parties with friends
Seeing Doug Stanhope live and getting a hug from him

IN MEMORIUM: Chris Cornell, Tom Petty, Hugh Hefner, Harry Dean Stanton, June Foray, Nichole Bass, Gregg Allman, Adam West, Martin Landau, Bernie Wrightson, Sonny Landham, Fats Domino, Chuck Berry, George Romero, Daisy Berkowitz, John Hurt, Shyla Stylez, Lawrence Montangne, Stewart Moss, Bernie Casey, Skip Homeier, Miguel Ferrer, Don Marshall, Len Wein, Tommy Castillo, Henry Deutschendorf and probably more I am forgetting at the moment.

IN REVIEW:

2017 was a bummer of a year. I started it out with goals and dreams and one by one they fell by the wayside. I spent a lot of time digging myself out of a lot of emotional windfall that remained from the previous year of events, so much so that I tried a therapist. Some things we did together worked, others did not. I let my health decline, sharply. I had a major scare of hand and wrist trouble. I thought the art part of me was over. I got into drinking heavily. I kept my feelings inside and didn't express myself well. Instead I ate and bought my feelings. Oh, how I did! It got bad. We had to cancel grand plans and vacations we wanted to do. We dealt with a car that was dying on us and let the stress of the outside world get to us. We spiraled... but importantly, we also healed.

I made progress on some new things. I made two new books and launched them via Kickstarter. The first was TALES FROM THE GORE... a horror comic tribute to my friend, Caleb. Then I took a bunch of short stories I had around, plus pinup and sketch art and released THE EROTIC ZONE graphic novel. Both were well funded and rated highly among those who supported them. I kept the podcast up, while attempting a vlog channel that sadly fizzled. I learned new skills at the day job that allows for better job security and personal growth.

My personal time was very limited. I barely could venture out to see friends. I couldn't take the time to see and absorb new media as much as I wanted to. I tried to play video games and watch new things when I could. But the whirlwind life that we live led to great periods of exhaustion, frustration and ultimately, unproductive habits.

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So now is the part where we discuss the goals of 2018. Before I go into this and finally cement the thoughts in stone, I will admit that moments ago, I took a long break in writing this and listened to the music that inspired some of what is to come... Just to play with the thoughts that have been in my head about all of this. I had to be sure that what I am about to say is really what I want. And after the last track ended, I still know... it is. Here we go.

Goals and resolutions are essentially embracing change. As I write this, I am a few days away from turning forty years old. I cannot keep doing what I always have. I can feel my body breaking. I must change what I do to it. I can feel my attitude sinking. I must change who I allow to effect it. I can feel my dreams fading... I must rekindle the love for them and daydream it all up again.

All of this is essentially, redefinition. Redefinition is changing who you are and that is nothing to be scared of. It is a major part of growth. Your values, goals, dreams... all of it changes. You learn to find what you really want and go after it. You finally look at the past and just let it go. Fucking goddammit already... LET IT GO!

So I am. Ive thought long and hard about this. My approach to things. My goals. The next phase. How I accomplish what I want. All of it.

Some of this is personal and I am not going to go into it here. But it involves better living, healthier living, sane living. But the other stuff, the big stuff, effects you here. So here it is.

In early 2018, the IDIOTHEAD MORNING SHOW PODCAST is ending. This BLOG that you are reading now, is ending. My physical online book STORE, is closing. And eventually, Idiothead.com as a website will likely shut down.

Um, what?? Yes, I said it.

Am I quitting? No. Fuck no. I couldn't if I wanted to. Art is how I chose to express myself and my life here on this ball of mud. You are stuck with me. That is, if you want to come along for the ride.

So I'm happy to officially announce that in early 2018, everything will transition over to my own personal PATREON PAGE. A new blog, new podcast, new music, monthly comics, other art stuff, writing.... all of it... is going there.

Idiothead.com as a site has been open for over 12 years. I have given out tons of free content during this time. Podcasts, 1,700 blog posts, pics, sketches, comics, audio, etc. All of which will remain and archived here for the time being. But NEW content will all go to the Patreon page. Yes, it will be behind a paywall, of sorts. But there are good reasons for this.

1~ It will allow me to fund my efforts and keep doing them, as well as contributing money toward my future and the future of my family.
2~ It helps me police who can see my stuff and what stuff can be seen. Ive had to keep stuff here at idiothead.com very SFW and I could not fully show progress stuff of my erotica I have been doing the last few years that seems to pay the bills way more than anything else I have attempted.
3~To finally and fully embrace my erotica work and put it more at the forefront of my business model.

This is a maturing, really. While I will miss the old ways of doing things, I have to be honest with myself and say it is not working. I get a nice amount of hits and downloads of the blog and podcast but it has not transitioned to many sales of physical media. My digital downloads and commissions have increased big time. Conventions are not an option because of the expense of them and very little payback. Its time to evolve and go to the big convention in the sky and be paid to do it. I will talk more about the Patreon breakdown in a later blogpost but it most likely will be $1 monthly access to blogs, $10 access to monthly erotica stories, downloads, podcasts, stories, commission shares, book sketches, BTS sketches and tutorials, etc. A LOT of the work will be erotica based but other things will find homes there. PLEASANT LIFE 2 will likely be dolled out in sections on the site... as well as other comics I have promised in the past but have been unable to finish. ANNA POCALYPSE 2, LINGERIE PARTY MASSACRE and others, for example. All will go on there. I will do a physical book run for those that want it, probably via Kickstarter or something. But I will not order many beyond those initial orders to stock a physical book store anymore. I will have to keep one available in some capacity to house the novels I have coming up... those long long long long long long long promised novels I have in various stages. I will clear my plate and get those out there. Promise.

The Patreon is the next step for me. To be honest, I am scared to do it. Its entirely possible I could close shop here, launch it and be doing all that work for like 3 to 5 people. Or maybe I could find many more that want my content. But I gotta chase the whimsies. I have to take the shot. I am inviting you guys to join me there for the ride. For less than the cost of a 20 oz soda, you can get all the content Ive always offered here and more. I think it is okay to ask people if they want to pay for what I do. After almost 25 years in self publishing, I think I am able to do that, finally. Ive paid the dues and then some.

So look for all of that early in the new year.

On the health front, at one point this year I was at the heaviest I had ever been at 415 pounds. I am proud to say that today I weigh 366 pounds. I know, its like throwing a chair off the Titanic, but hey, its a start! When I actually start walking again and kicking the soda demon once again, the pounds will start dripping off again like they did before. Id be happy to be around 250. Just being a fat guy would be fine enough. Raise the stats a bit. Get out of 4X shirts. It is doable.

I have so much to save and plan for. These first few months are going to be difficult. With dieting, saving money, working lots of overtime and drawing in every spare moment I got to launch this Patreon thing... its going to be a challenge. But it is one I am ready for. I cannot look to outside sources to make myself happy, it starts right here. Change comes from within. And to turn 40 is a life change. One I am ready to embrace and kick some ass with. I look forward to all that is to come. Good or bad, tough or easy.. I'm ready to face it.


I wish everyone a safe and happy new year. I wish everyone to follow their own personal goals of change and growth. We can change and be the better version of ourselves. Tell the world to eat your ass and balls and go out and make it happen. We get one shot at this life, folks. Time to step to the line and take the fucking shot. Get it done.

Onward and upward! ~~T

2016. HERE WE GO!

Well I made it into the new year! And with that comes the great knowledge that things will continue to evolve and improve. I genuinely feel that things are headed to big change for me. I will strive to hit my goals, personal and professional, and keep rockin' and rolling into this life.

I thought I would share some pics of how I spent my New Year Eve:

I scored some new vinyl courtesy of THE RECORD LOUNGE in East Lansing, MI

I had my kids for part of the day. Lil' James decided to become my intern, erasing my pencils off my inked pages.

A while back I had a contest on Facebook to where certain people would get added to a page in Starslam 2. So I light pencilled some of the winners. Once they see it inked and colored, I'll bet they'll regret asking to be in there!

I took the kids to Toys R Us and James got a new Vacuum. He's obsessed with Vacuums and so I knew he'd love this. Now he has like, 7 now or something.

After the kids left, I made the greatest party mixed drink ever. It is now lovingly dubbed: The Ecto Cooler! I pretty much drank all of it by myself.

Misty made pizza rolls and stuffed mushrooms. YUM!

While waiting for our guests to arrive I spun some 45's I got. I never get to enjoy these records that much.

My old friends Matt and Michelle came down and stayed with us and brought a TON of booze and food for the party.

...including the dreaded ABSINTHE!!! UGHHHH... I don't want to talk about it. Even a small shot was too much for me.

Yeah, we're all pretty drunk as hell after the ball dropped.

Someone stole my hat!

The next morning we piled into the Bat Blazer and hit Sophie's for some breakfast. Then we came home to quite the mess:

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Boy we party hard don't we? And I'm telling you... I'm paying for it dearly! I'm not what I used to be!

All in all it was a great fucking night. We watched old 16 year footage of young me and my friends doing skits and random fake commercials we shot back in the day. All embarassing. But the memories flooded back. Seems like yesterday. Seems like a lifetime ago. It was good to relive it.

But now here it is. 2016. New year. New promises. New life. Many challenges ahead.

I sit here knowing full well what I want and what I gotta do to get it. Now lets see if I can make it happen over the next 12 months. Fuck it. We're here. We made it. Lets start living, shall we?

Onward and upward my friends!

T

First Post of 2014!

Hey all! I survived the New Year and we're into the new clean slate of 2014. I threw a party here at the house and my friends Robert, Erin, Matt and Michelle all came to drink tons of booze, listen to records and tell dirty stories. Lots of fun!

Pics from our New Years celebration:

A great improvement from last year where the wife worked till 11:45 and we watched the ball drop and then went to bed, bored. We were having so much fun that we even missed the clock change-over. We noticed the clock at 12:01. Oops! Heh. But it was great to hang with everyone and I hope it happens again soon.

I have made a time plot for things I am working on and plans I have for 2014 for my workload. This first quarter is a VERY busy time, so I might not get to blog or podcast as much as usual. I want to stay busy and focused and ride this wave of momentum I seem to have found. A tease:

This is a shirt idea I drew last year and had planned for a while. I think I am gonna do a few for the 20th Anniversary! What do you think? Sometime in April, I'll look into getting them printed and in the online store and take em with me to the conventions. Details at a later time. I just wanted you to see a smidgeon of the stuff in the kitchen.

Finally, FINALLY I saw Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug. I quite liked it, despite the abrupt and maddening ending. I can't believe I have to wait a whole year again to see the conclusion! Oh well. It will be worth it I am sure. I know people are dogging on Peter Jackson's take on the Hobbit, but I don't care. I'm entertained and am enjoying the ride. In the end, thats all I ask for.

Lots of great movies are coming in 2014. Here's a list of ones that are on my radar:

GODZILLA - Holy crap are the trailers looking awesome! Plus Bryan Cranston.

NOAH - Call me a sucker, but I've always been interested in the story of Noah and the ark. Even the Epic of Gilgamesh. And it looks beyond cool. I love a well done biblical epic. Don't have to be religious to enjoy a tale of legend.

HOBBIT 3 - Duh.

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON 2 - I loved the first one. Really excited about the sequel.

SIN CITY 2 - Ditto, and it covers my favorite of the Frank Miller novels: A Dame to Kill For. Should be good fun.

XMEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST - I kind of lost interest in the Xmen flicks after X2. Although FIRST CLASS was good. I never saw the wolverine movies, except for a bit of the first one on TV once. But this one has great potential. Both casts converging and making a huge epic flick that might lead into another one. We'll see. I'll probably wait till disc for it, unless the reviews say its a MUST SEE.

POMPEII - I love ancient Roman/Greek stories. And the story of Pompeii is always a fascinating one. In college I studied a lot of the found ruins and artworks from there. I know the story well. It will be great to see another take on it. (and yes, I saw the Doctor Who one...)

NYMPHOMANIAC - The trailers are interesting. It looks bold and artsy. Why not.

DUMB AND DUMBER TO - Finally, a real sequel to one of my favorite stupid 90's movies. Should be great to see them on the screen again, and Carrey back to his roots.

INTERSTELLER - Everything I read interests me about this. Nolan's bold 2001ish movie? Color me extremely curious.

So: LOTS to look forward to in the coming year. I'll probably do a list of albums I am looking forward to in 2014 sometime soon. But for now, back to work!

Cheers, T

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I wasn't going to do this post, but I didn't want to end 2013 here with the downer that was the last posting. It did get a lot of hits though. Thanks very much for coming back and caring to read it. You never know what people are going to care about when you put it out in the world, even when its somethng small like a blog post from your frustrated mind. So I appreciate the hits. Biggest blog reads in a while now. Thanks for that.

I am happy to say that today is another day and after I posted that, I chained myself to my table to get some work done on commissions. And in the last couple days, I pencilled 10 small commissioned adult art pages for a regular client I have. I pencilled them on 8x11, inked and digitally colored most of them. Plus I did a piece I am giving to friends as a wedding present. It would be easy to say "Forget what I said, I'M BACK" but I know that the comfort demon is always right around the corner, ready to rub my shoulders and make me submit. He always wants me to lose my focus.

Some things help. Like seeing others' zeal for their own self-published works. Like BECKY CLOONAN. Also, JOE PEACOCK's writing always seems to be a great source of fuel for me to sip. Lastly, its the knowledge that no, I am not quitting. I never wanted to quit. I just get scared that it would be so easy to. Like the drive has dissapated as I get older, but I can adjust. Thats good to know. Deep in my core, I haven't changed and will not change. And that I take with me into 2014.

On my newest Idiothead Morning Show Podcast (Subscribe HERE for FREE!), I talked about 2013 and going into 2014 with some goals. Not resolutions, but things to look forward to.

1-GET ONLINE STORE GOING AGAIN - My books have been out of print for years now. I need to monotize what I already have and not worry about the next thing until I am taking care of the babies I got. So Anna will get redone. Pleasant Life will be collected and put in one big book. I plan on doing a 20th Anniversary Tshirt and get the Artbook printed finally. Plus more to come. I need to make $ on what I already own. Its important. I feel like a shlub saying I do books when all my books are sold out and I never have any at the shows.

2-CELEBRATE 20 YEARS - I've talked about it repeatedly that 2014 is my 20th year doing comics. I want to celebrate it. Talk about it more. At the cons, have balloons and cake. Show people why I am celebrating and let people know I care enough to celebrate it. I feel like I've earned that.

3-FINISH MY FOUR PROJECTS - First, the Starslam trade... which I only have about 20 more pages to go on it. Then release it online and a tradebook. Then there's TALES of SEQUENTIAL MAYHEM #3. My art is done. Just have to put it all together and launch a Kickstarter in January. That is all rolling. Lastly, my two written books: The short story/poem collection and the "My life working in the Sex Stores" autobiography. I am about 80 pages deep in both and I plan to finish both by March, with a first draft for each at least. The short story one I will likely self publish but I am seeking a publisher for the autobiography. But I am not worrying about that until I have a working draft. But all four things will be released next year. Guaranteed.

4-DISCOVER MORE MUSIC - Continue my vinyl rediscovery but also branch out into new music and keep the fuel going. An easy no-brainer.

5-TREAT MYSELF NICER - Joe Peacock said in his latest blog something I never thought about. He said that "I own myself." Thats true. I own my brain and my body. But I always put myself down and don't take care of myself. Physical, mental. I say these self-depricating jokes as a sort of defense mechanism to feel like I am taking the thunder away from anyone who would be thinking it for me. So no more fat jokes about myself. I've been taking energy vitamins. I'm going to continue that. Cut sugars and make one meal a day a healthy one. Just start slow. No fast food. Can't much anymore because the wife's student loans have caught up to us and we have to start paying on them! So just start with that and transition with the flow. But also with this, just to stop the doubts. Move forward. Keep going. Treat myself nicer. Rebuild confidence. Get louder. Celebrate more. Buy myself the more expensive soap or mouthwash instead of the generic one. Because I celebrate my value on this planet and I deserve it. and thats what I mean about treating myself nicer. Ya dig?

2013 had its strikes and gutters, ups and downs. I'd relist them, but I don't have to. Its behind me and only a fool trips on baggage behind them. I'm moving forward. Take me into your arms, 2014. I'm ready.

Everyone: Thanks for reading and caring to keep coming back to check out my little corner of the world. It means more than you know. Be safe, take care and I know you're going to have a great year!

Peace and love, T